Friday, March 12, 2010

Discordant notes

A new, saddening syndrome setting into the minds of our modern women/wives who have come out of ignorance, diffidence, subordination etc of their grandmothers: not satisfied in bed!!!
Now my humble two cents: young women of our times have not grasped the real essence of male psycho in spite of their intelligent approaches in many other matters. It is a matter where our grandmothers excelled and led a happy, satisfied( including sex!) life. In the women’s fortnightly, ‘Kumudham snehidhi’ there is a brilliant column by a lady doctor(pshychiatry, I suppose) under the title, ‘How to tackle men’. She very clearly explains the basic differences in the way men and women think, emote, react etc. She gives tips to win over one’s man with tact and patience. It is a very interesting, intelligent serial which would benefit young women if they follow it.

In our culture, in our households this ‘openness’ of marital relationship is quite new, as Iyer has said truly. Let me elaborate: in my young years very rarely households had double beds for married couple!!! It was seen in cinema! ( My grandma used to say the turn of sleeping in the available room by the couples in joint families came not frequently!!! Still they multiplied more fast!!!)Children had no inkling that their parents slept together! From an age of innocence and slow sexual education we have changed suddenly. TV ads alone are enough to teach our tots what even teens had only slight knowledge of in the bygone years. The point to note is women have easily come to terms with the changes in awareness levels unlike our men who are struggling yet to come out of their centuries-old perspectives of feminine qualities of shyness, submission, restraints etc. They are baffled by the new brave, bold women. Not all men are so backward!!! Their hormonal urges, needs are the same! The point to be remembered here is the level of maturity a woman has to cultivate before tackling her man to her adavantage. It is wise to remember that a wife is all roles rolled into one- a friend, mother,, advisor, servant etc. It takes a lot of patience and sagacity to manage this mega role of wife. the main drawback of our young women is they are not patient enough. They cannot read the nuances of moods, tastes and loyalties with a motherly indulgence. To succeed in marriage is a skill that needs patient training and waiting. A bit of humility, a little giving in the partner, a compromising, adjusting mentality are secrets of success. My favourite belief is the husband is the wife’s first child. Treat him like one and the rewards will be great and never-ending!

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